
Oh my goodness. I just found this article from 1870s. It's of Walter Davidge at a trial, he is cross-examining a Michael Hayes. Well, the trial is for "The Safe Burglary". He amuses me muchly. (Walter Davidge was part of the family whos papers I worked on three years ago. I heart that family.)
Anyways, an excerpt from the cross-examination:
Mr. Davidge(WD): Witness was engaged in the shipping business in 1872. Was solicitor for shipping crews, and sometimes solicited captains. Did you not tell me yesterday that you never acted in that capacity?
Mr. Hayes(MH): No, sir. You asked me if I was a runner for a sailor boarding-house. I do not recognize any such term. I never found it in a dictionary.
WD: Well, you may be right about the vernacular, but I am right about the truth.
Some reports are read. Now Walter gets in trouble with the judge.
WD: Well now, Hayes, you ust behave yourself or you will be made to do it, or the Court will take hold of you.
Judge Humphreys(JH): Well, Mr. Davidge, the witness has a right to protect himself.
WD: Not by impudence, your Honor.
JH: I can't tell how far impudence may be retorted.
WD: Well, I am not aware that I merit that remark.
JH: Now, sit down, Mr. Davidge, or you will be made to do so.
WD: Very well, sir.
Now he gets in trouble himself for using vernacular.
WD (talking to MH): Did you not so swear?
JH: Mr. Davidge, you must not repeat the word swear so often. It is objectionable. The witness is sworn to state the truth at the beginning. He swears but once, and it is a continuous oath. You must use the words "did you so state".
WD: Does your Honor object to my vernacular?
JH: No. I do not rule it, but you know what I mean. Go on now, go on.
Later on he wants to read an extract from the report, the judge refuses him...
WD, interupting: Your Honor, I cannot proceed in this case if I am to be-why, this is an insult.
JH: Will you just sit down a minute now? This word pretense is not used in the sense of impeaching your sense of honor, or is any such objectionable manner, but in a legal way. You are introducing what has not really a right to be admitted.
WD: Well, your Honor can at least allow me to reduce the proposition to writing, and note an objection. [Mr. Davidge commenced to write...]
Ok, I'm a dork, but it amuses me to read the dialogue from one of his trials.